Did Heller get a scene like this? Mostly I remember him eating a ton of cheeseburgers and ice cream. I don't recall him boggling at why you'd slice a loaf of bread in half and stick some meat between it, but that was three books ago.
Krak asks the stewardess for some hot jolt. The stewardess explains that they don't serve hard liquor on the early morning flight. Gris is shocked at the potential Code Break.
Now, we've been on Earth for four books by this point, and nobody has caught on to the fact that the guy with the revolutionary technology and who says things like "this planet" all the time might be an alien. I think it's safe to say that asking for a strange beverage isn't going to make people suspect that Krak is an extraterrestrial. More importantly, who's going to enforce a Code Break? Gris is the only one watching. Is he going to get up and fly all the way to New York and arrest Heller or Krak? Write a report to his boss? Or suppose the humans suddenly develop the ability to put two and two together and realize there are aliens among them - what happens then? The Apparatus controls the flow of information to and from the planet, so they ought to be able to find a way to keep the debacle under wraps until Hisst can complete his coup.
The point is, Code Breaks don't matter, and have never mattered, so there's no reason to keep bringing them up and expect some sort of tension from them.
So let's find some excitement elsewhere. As Gris makes himself comfortable in preparation of watching Krak fly all the damn way to New York, "to make very sure this lepertige got out of Turkey," he idly fondles his "rank locket," an emerald bit of jewelry he borrowed from Utanc's stash because he lost his actual insignia. But it's "GONE!" Oh, the drama! How will Utanc react if she learns Gris lost one of her trinkets?!
Gris rushes out into the hospital, asking if anyone's seen an emerald whatsit, backtracking, searching, but to no avail. "Oh, Gods, Utanc would scream and rage and throw things in absolute hurricanes for days, weeks, months!" And of course Gris can't replace it because he's broke. So he spends an hour waiting after dispatching the cab driver whose name was only relevant for a gag in a single chapter of the last book, only to be told that there's no sign of the thing.
So Gris gives up and goes back to watching Krak on the viewscreen.
She's reading a French fashion rag called Oo La La, La Femme, which leaves me trying to think of a word that means the opposite of enthusiasm. Yes, as the book jacket promised, Hubbard is going to turn his razor-sharp satirical wit to the world of modeling and clothes design
Somebody had explained all this to me once--a man on a plane. He had said the fashion designers were all homos and they hated women because they saw in them competition. So they covertly dressed them as bizarrely as possible to keep men off of them. He was probably right. Looking at these pictures made me hate homos all the more! To dress women strangely was one thing but to dress them so expensively was unforgivable!
If you think jealous homosexual fashionistas trying to change men's sexual orientation by designing ugly dresses is the stupidest plan you've ever heard, obviously you're new to this blog and need to start at Mission Earth's beginning.
Krak evidently isn't impressed with "Le Look Garbâge" and discards her first magazine for the American Vague... what the hell, that was understated and somewhat clever! While she studies "The Marionette Look" (women twisted and strangled by strings), the woman sitting next to Krak introduces herself as Mamie Boomp, a singer returning home after touring the Middle East. This evidently involved threatening to castrate the king of Morocco and cut off his foreign aid if he didn't give Boomp a diamond ring. Also, Morocco is in northwest Africa.
Boomp asks about the "rags" Krak is wearing (tactful woman, Miss Boomp) and comments that she looks like she just came out of a "camel crash," causing Krak to explain that she was held captive for three years in a fortress. This leads to Boomp boasting of her own adventures and showing off the diamond ring she blackmailed Moroccan royalty for. Krak asks what other kinds of jewelry are valued "on this planet?" As expected, her companion doesn't bat an eye at this.
While Boomp tutors Krak on fashion and "what really puts the beasts in heat," Gris suddenly remembers those suspicious incidents of bodily contact between him and the Countess.
Sleight of hand She was an expert at it. She had trained magicians by the score! All she had to do was unhook the clasp with one hand and catch it as it fell into the other!Conviction! The Countess Krak had the emerald locket!
So wow, lots of stuff in this chapter. The ongoing tension between Gris stating the obvious and Gris always being wrong. A plot to turn the world gay that doesn't involve psychology (yet). Gris having to replace his "girlfriend"'s jewelry before she finds out he borrowed and lost it. And I think there was something about aliens, but it didn't seem all that important.
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