On their way back to their quarters, Gris takes Heller to Spiteos' topmost tower to catch a much-needed breath of fresh air under the star-studded desert sky, and to have an important talk. Feeling strange brotherly feelings for his fellow officer, Gris restates Mission Earth's importance and warns Heller that despite his training as a combat engineer he needs to follow Gris' lead in the area of espionage. And romance, apparently. "That female you met this afternoon is trouble. Trouble with a capital crash!"
...Okay, Hubbard, that's how you want to play it? Fine. Then your book is dumb with a capital crap.
Gris explains the Countess Krak's dark backstory. She's a real countess, but her true name is Lissus Moam, and three years ago on Planet Manco (capitalization required, apparently) she was arrested and sentenced to death for training a bunch of children to kill guards and rob banks. The kids were executed, she wound up working for the Apparatus. We've been told this before, and I'm not sure why I'm repeating it.
Anyway, Krak has killed three guards since she arrived at Spiteos. One touched her hair, so she stabbed him in the heart with the butt of her whip. Another whispered something in her ear, so she yanked his head back until his back snapped in three places, leaving him to die in agony days later. The third groped her during hand-to-hand training - thigh-high boots and jacket and nothing else, remember? - which ended in him mashed into a "red paste" without a single unbroken bone in his corpse. Lombar Hisst is the only person to survive striking the Countess.
Heller finally starts paying attention after learning Hisst has beat Krak, utterly ignoring the three murders she's committed. Gris admits that Hisst is a bit of an abusive boss, but reiterates that Heller should stay away from the Countess, who is "death incarnate," if he values his life.
After a long, thoughtful silence, Heller stirs and asks Gris if he thinks Krak's eyes are a pale blue or gray. A perfect moment for the sarcastic trumpet wha-wha-whaaaaaaa sound effect.
Well, it's nice that Heller is showing some imperfection besides "too honorable and pure for intelligence work," even if this makes him a lovesick fool who's completely blind to his beau's homicidal tendencies. So he's 90% obnoxiously perfect, 10% utter moron... which isn't much of an improvement.
Of course there's more to the Countess than that, since we can't have Jettero Heller falling in love with a villain. But that's later.
Back to Chapter Four
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