Gris returns to his room to find Heller lounging around not studying for the mission, instead listening to love songs performed by very emo artists who - Goth kids take note - "paint their faces black for 'unrequited love' and by means of tubes beside their eyes they shed red tears--tears of blood." And if that's not bad enough, there's the song itself:
And so faded my glow
Into the sorrow
That took me in tow
To the deep pits of woe
And with my last breath
I'll still cry for death
And grave clothes to use
as my trousseau.
So here's the riddle: is the song intended to be this bad? Gris finds it "sickening," of course, but are we meant to agree with the little misanthrope's opinion, or dismiss him for being an antisocial twerp? Is this a parody of angsty romantic music, or Hubbard's earnest attempt at songwriting?
It is only now that Gris figures out what he's dealing with - the awesome power of love. His training warned of the emotion and described how it brought ruin even to mighty royal dynasties. Sadly, the Apparatus solution - shooting people - isn't an option here. So Gris just reminds Heller that he's got an appointment with the Countess, and off he goes to clean up and get ready.
They go to Krak's training areas, but one of the Countess' minions has a summons for Gris, so he sends Heller on and hustles off to answer it. It takes him a full hour to go to Camp Endurance and see what the fuss is about, but the confused personnel there say that the only summons they've heard of was from that morning. It was all just a clever ruse by the Countess to get Gris away, so she could... stare adoringly at Heller while he listened to high-speed language tapes. For two hours. Without interruptions from Gris. Wow.
A thoroughly-disgusted Gris makes some calls and moves some paper around, then pops back in to see Krak and Heller engaging in what he initially mistakes for combat training. But it's actually some bizarre dance called the "Shatter" that involves the participants alternating between lunging at and dodging each other. I guess this is better than having them doing a generic waltz or something, since these guys are aliens after all, so points for effort, Hubbard. It's just a shame that what you come up with to make your alien culture unique tends to be stupid or lame.
Wait, maybe the dance is a parody too?
Then Krak "accidentally" lets Heller bump into her, and to Gris' astonishment doesn't rend the man limb from limb. He watches the Countess and Heller have a good smooch, complete with a whispered "Oh, Jet" that Gris can hear across the room. He has to clap his hands thrice to get their attention and remind them that Heller has an appointment with Dr. Crobe. At least Heller's unlikely to French him.
I'm having Attack of the Clones flashbacks.
Back to Chapter One
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